Friday, November 29, 2013

Happy Black Friday



It's funny. I checked all the flyers in the newspaper.

I even bought the newspaper for the first time all year just to get the flyers. And I couldn't find anything on sale that I really wanted. Sure, they had televisions for cheap that were 2x larger than the television I MIGHT upgrade.

Same goes for items I might want to give as Christmas gifts.

Nothing seemed worth the bother. My only motivation to venture out on Black Friday was to cheese off anti-capitalists whining about stores being open on Thanksgiving. And that's cruddy motivation.

Next year, I should hire actors to stage an incident outside Walmart. We'd stage a fight between two people, maybe a big white guy and a tiny black woman, over some junk advertised for cheap earlier in the week as going on sale. I'd buy the item full-priced, put it in a Walmart bag then hand it to the less-sympathetic looking actor, with instructions to defend him/herself against the more-sympathetic actor who is claiming it by virtue of deserving it more.

The whole idea would be to stage the fight at whatever door has a news crew camped outside.

If that works (and nobody goes to jail), we repeat the performance at Target.

Think of it as performance art. What do you say? Sound like fun?

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